Quick answer
Pick for the lyrics, test for the tempo, cut it to about two minutes. For a parent who doesn't dance, a gentle 3-count (waltz) or a steady 4-count sway (slow rumba) is the easiest to follow. Any song works, as long as you can both feel the beat.
I've been teaching dance for 19 years, and the parent dance is the one couples ask me about in the softest voice. The song matters, but what you do on the floor matters more. Our wedding dance lessons in Montreal build the whole dance around the song you choose.
How to pick: three questions
- Do the words sound like you two? If you wince at a line, skip it. You will hear it 50 times in rehearsal.
- Can you tap the beat? If you can, your parent can too. Avoid songs where the beat hides.
- Can it be cut? Two minutes is plenty. Ask your DJ for a fade you choose.
Not sure what the lessons cover? Our father-daughter dance guide walks through them. For choosing any wedding song, see how to choose your wedding dance song.
Father-daughter dance songs
| Song | Artist | Dance it as |
|---|---|---|
| My Girl | The Temptations | Easy sway |
| Isn't She Lovely | Stevie Wonder | Easy sway, lively |
| I Loved Her First | Heartland | Slow sway or waltz |
| Butterfly Kisses | Bob Carlisle | Slow sway |
| Father and Daughter | Paul Simon | Gentle sway, light |
| What a Wonderful World | Louis Armstrong | Slow sway |
| Moon River | Andy Williams | Waltz |
| Sway | Dean Martin | Rumba or cha-cha, fun |
Mother-son dance songs
| Song | Artist | Dance it as |
|---|---|---|
| You Raise Me Up | Josh Groban | Slow sway |
| Wind Beneath My Wings | Bette Midler | Slow sway |
| You Are the Sunshine of My Life | Stevie Wonder | Easy sway, light |
| Forever Young | Rod Stewart | Gentle sway |
| Shower the People | James Taylor | Easy sway |
| Ain't No Mountain High Enough | Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell | Upbeat sway or swing |
| Can't Take My Eyes Off You | Frankie Valli | Swing, playful |
Mother-daughter and father-son
The same rules apply, so borrow from both lists. Two picks that suit any pair:
- "Stand by Me" by Ben E. King: a steady beat that keeps nerves in check. Dance it as an easy sway.
- "Fly Me to the Moon" by Frank Sinatra: a light swing for a pair who like to laugh.
One song for both parents
A combined dance puts both pairs on the floor together. It saves a song and shares the spotlight.
- Start with one pair, then wave the second pair in at the second verse.
- Choose a middle-of-the-road tempo, so neither pair feels rushed or dragged.
- Agree on the ending in advance. A group hug works every time.
Stepparents, two dads, a parent who has passed
There is no rule about who dances. Two parents can share the song, one after the other. A parent who has passed can be honoured with the lyrics, a photo on a chair, or "Dance with My Father" by Luther Vandross as the song you walk out to.
Pick the people who matter and the song follows.
The mid-song switch
Start slow, then move into something lively. It works when your parent is shy at first.
- First minute: a slow sway, just a hold and a step.
- Second minute: a Latin beat (cha-cha or a steady bachata), and wave the guests in.
- The cut: ask your DJ to blend the two songs at a spot you rehearsed, and tell them the exact timing.
Practice it in 10 minutes a night
You don't need a studio every night. Put the cut version on and run the sway, the turn and the ending. That's it.
For the step-by-step plan, see our guide to father-daughter dance lessons and the mother-son dance ideas.
Questions about parent dances
How long should a parent dance be?
About two minutes. It is long enough for a hold, a sway, a turn and an ending, and short enough that nobody runs out of steps.
Do the father-daughter and mother-son dances happen back to back?
Often, yes, but you choose. Many couples run them one after the other, then invite everyone onto the floor.
Can we do one dance for both parents?
Yes. A combined dance works well when you choose a medium tempo and agree on the ending.
What if my dad really can't dance?
That is the most common case. A hold, a sway and one turn are all it takes, and I teach it from zero.
Can we use any song?
Yes. If it isn't obvious how to move to it, we find the beat together in the first lesson.
Your next step
Send me your song and your date, and I'll tell you how I'd dance it. The call is free and takes 15 minutes. Every lesson is with me, in English, French or Russian.
Alina Litvak, Founder of Dance Studio "Quartier Latin"
Two-time Canadian Vice-Champion • 19 Years Teaching Experience
